Matthew Reed, who flogs unofficial Arsenal merchandise in the streets around Highbury, has been taken to the High Court by the club, who are trying to protect their trademarks.

Arsenal want an order to stop people using the name Arsenal, the word Gunners, and club insignia (the crest and badge) on any unofficial gear. Reed's defence is that he isn't trying to claim the trademarks... and that people can tell the difference between official and unofficial stuff.

But the judge in the case, Mr Justice Laddie was in fine form, waving scarves above his head and inquiring about the availability of Arsenal-branded gravestones.

Examining an official club watch, he joked: 'Presumably that's so you can protest when the ref refuses to allow extra time to score the winning goal?' - No, that would be a ManU watch. These days, the sooner 90 mins comes, the happier we are!

As they say on all these court stories, on proper web sites... the case continues.